This morning after dropping of my son at school I went down to the stores to shop for some jeans. Rarely do I ever shop for clothes. I am not what you call a fashionista by any sense of the imagination. I purchase clothes on a 'need to' not 'want to' basis. Maybe it is an in herited trait passed down from my mother. She would purchase something new only for weddings or funerals. I am not attending neither a wedding nor a funeral so this really felt like indulgant shopping. While perusing the racks at Ross I found my DNA causing guilty thoughts to pop into my head. "How can you be shopping for jeans when Grace needs new tennis shoes?" "The kids don't even have their own jeans for winter yet." While these thoughts were still wreaking havoc in my mind, slowly I became aware of something else...my middle age.
Could it be that I have been out of touch for too long? How many different kinds of jeans are out there?!? Dark blue, acid wash, boot cut, button fly...the choices were endless. I finally found a few pair and went into one of the dressing rooms. What I thought were a light blue jean was not light blue at all. My vision wasn't as good as it used to be...another sign of my middle age. While looking in the three way mirror with these jeans on, I instantly became a rocker chick from a Bon Jovi concert. Those definitely wouldn't work. Next I tried on some cute Levi's, they fit great but the length was more for a 2nd grader. Were these jeans or capri's? I had no clue so off they came. Then I found them,the perfect pair, they fit great, felt good and looked pretty good on...but there was a problem. Their flaw? They were WAY TOO LOW! My belly rolls hung over the top like a woman who was having an early midlife crisis or a later in life pregnancy. Who in the world can wear these kinds of jeans? Certainly only a 14yr old...then why were they in the woman's section?!?
I couldn't help but think of a Saturday Night Live skit that I had seen that had cracked me up. It is called 'mom-jeans'. I have attached the video below.
Oh, and by the way...I never did find a pair of jeans.