Monday, February 2, 2009

I need a little help.


Would you mind giving me a hand? I need your help. I am working on my book for moms, See Jane Run - A Practical Guide to Breaking the Bondage of Busyness and the Captivity of Activity. The chapter that I am writing now is, "I Want to Leave a Legacy."

Yep, just like the chorus in the song Legacy by Nichole Nordeman. Same one that's playing right now on my blog. I thought I'd set the mood...

While I was getting ready this morning I was surprised that my husband and I had a debate about our thoughts on leaving a legacy for our children. My ideas about leaving a legacy and his were so different. I will fill you in more later, don't want to sway your answers.

Since I am concerned that I could be a little out of touch here, would you mind helping a fellow blogging mom out? It would bless me if I could use your thoughts as part of my research for this book.

If you feel so inclined, would you answer a few of the quetions below?

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children?

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy?

4. If you don't live with your legacy in mind, as a mom, what fuels you to raise up your children?


Thank you friends! I can't wait to read your answers.




16 comments:

momstheword said...

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children?

I have never thought of it as a legacy but it is. The things we teach our children, the lessons they've learned, the character traits, internal boundaries and behaviors that we have sought to prayerfully instill in them, the love we've given them, all of these things will live on in our children after we die.

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?

A mom is her child's most natural teacher. She begins teaching that child from birth. She teaches him/her about love, about the world around them, about relationships, the difference between right and wrong and many other things.

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy?

My faith in the Lord and my love for my husband and family. They are the reasons why I do what I do.

4. If you don't live with your legacy in mind, as a mom, what fuels you to raise up your children?

I don't think that I live constantly thinking about a legacy. I just love my children and I want them to feel that they are loved. I want them to grow up believing in family, and have faith in the Lord. I want them never to take their freedom for granted and I want them to have hope for their future.

Mari said...

Wow - deep questions from you tonight! Yes, I have thought about leaving a legacy and it's something I would like to do.
1)I believe my Dad's family has a great legacy and I want to continue it! He comes from a family of 9 kids. All but one of them has kids - from 3 - 7 kids each. That's a lot of cousins. Then, if you think that some of those cousins now have grandkids, it's really huge. The incredible thing about this family is that every member of the family, (including at this point all the great grandchildren who are grown) have all confessed to being a Christian. From what I have seen every one is involved in a Bible believing church. I hear stories from the aunts about my Grandma and her great sense of humor and all the fun they had, but she also taught her kids and prayed for them. My Grandpa worked hard and wasn't a teaser like my Grandma, but he loved his kids and taught them the value of work and commitment to God and church. So - if I can leave a legacy anything like that - teaching faith and having fun, I would be thrilled!
2) I taught my kids about God and prayer. We also taught by example, going to church regularly and praying and reading the Bible at meals. We also have done lots of teasing and having fun together!
3) My kids know how much I love them and that I would do whatever I could or would be good for them. They also know that Faith is very important in this house and they have all professed the same faith.
Hope this helps!

Sheryl said...

One of my all time favorite songs because I SO want to leave a legacy for my children and for that matter - anyone who has known me.

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children? OFTEN

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?
I DON'T KNOW THAT IT'S A CONSCIENCE EFFORT ON LEAVING A LEGACY BUT I WOULD HOPE THAT OTHERS (MY KIDS INCLUDED) WOULD SEE CHRIST. THAT MY LOVE FOR THE LORD AND HIS WORD WOULD BE SOMETHING MY CHILDREN WOULD REMEMBER AND WANT TO EMULATE.
3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy? DEFINED MY LEGACY? HOPEFULLY MY WALK WITH THE LORD.

4. If you don't live with your legacy in mind, as a mom, what fuels you to raise up your children?

Hope you know I was not yelling - ha! Just thought the caps would help with reading my answers.

Kate said...

Hey Joanne, great deep thoughts!
For me, I have resolved that all the generational crap that has haunted my family and been passed down for years, stops with me. I make a conscious effort everyday to be available to my little guy, as well, for all the little projects he likes to do with me. I can hardly remember a time when my parents would just sit down with us and do something besides tv watching. I want to leave a legacy of REALLY knowing who he is as a person, which is something I have not had in my relationship with my parents. And I came to Jesus despite my parents; I want to be my son's first example of Jesus.

And of course, with all the stuff life has brought my way, a lot of it not so good, I'd like my son to see me as someone whose life Jesus took out of the ashes and made into something of beauty. I also want him to think of me as someone who lived very intentionally everyday, even if I didn't fulfill my FBI dreams! LOL

Beth (A Mom's Life) said...

I want my kids to see my faith in action. I want them to see me helping others. I want them to see me take a stand for something I believe in. I want them to see me working for Christ.

I want my kids to know that I put my complete faith and trust in Jesus. I want my kids to see me putting my complete faith and trust in Jesus.

Growin' with it! said...

i don't even have to think twice on this one! God's grace. that is by far the biggest legacy i want my boys to remember. i knew "grace" as the mealtime prayer and that was it. what i have come to understand and am still learning about is how God's grace allows me to mess up and still be loved. i want my boys to know that mommy is NO where near perfect and they don't have to be either. but the flip side is that because of God's love and grace, I want to be the best mom, wife, friend, child of God I can be!

can't wait to hear how this all turns out!

Elizabeth M Thompson said...

Joanne,this is a great idea. I want to read all your readers' responses, too!

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children?

Yes, I live with the end results in mind. I am not raising kids, but adults. Sure, they are kids now but when they reach adulthood, I hope they've already arrived at maturity.

We do specific things to create a family identity: we like to hike, we love learning, we love Jesus! There are many statements like those that define us as a group, not a bunch of individuals co-habitating.

When my children remember their childhood, I want them to remember great, fun times with lots of laughter. I want them to know they have a secure foundation of family and faith on which to build their lives. I want them to have all the practical tools they need to succeed in whatever God calls them to. That will be our legacy.

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?

I live how I want them to live. (Okay, not perfectly, but you know what I mean. I don't try to get my kiddos to do/be what I will not do/be.)

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy?

I would say compassion. Our family has suffered many painful losses. As a result our children have very tender hearts towards those who are hurting. I would be very surprised if compassion did not play a huge role in the decisions my children make as adults.

4. If you don't live with your legacy in mind, as a mom, what fuels you to raise up your children? N/A

Thanks for directing my thoughts this morning!

Angela said...

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children?

I OFTEN think about this very thing. Often times, I imagine them on thier journey through life as if it is a long road they are travelling. I want to provide posts, or mile markers of sorts, that they can hitch to along the way. When they come to a point in life when they have to live out their own values/love/choices, I want those "hitching post memories" to help them define who THEY want to be. Whether it is a memory of how we spent a certain birthday or if it is a memory of how I served the Lord through serving their Daddy, I just want them to see who THEY want to be in the choices that thier Daddy and I live out for them everyday.

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?

I think I try to purpose it in many different aspects. I plan things to each them certain values that I hold close to my heart, but we also try to live those same values in our lives consistently.

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy?

My relationship with the Lord, most certainly.

Susan said...

I frequently think about leaving a legacy, but not 24/7. I try to be Jesus to them to the best of my limited ability. I gently pounce upon teachable moments. When they say or do something, when we hear something on the tv or radio, whenever something comes up that I can ask a question or direct a comment, I try to capitalize on the moment. When they were small, it was easier. Now that they're 18 & 20, they're smart enough to know what's coming - which shows that they've been trained!! haha
I also listen carefully for their comments. I overhear them parroting what they've heard my husband or me say to them in the past. Once, I shared with my daughter about how I felt a lack of confidence about something, and she encouraged me, not even realizing she was using words I had encouraged her with.
I also agree wholeheartedly with Kate's comments. Growing up in a dysfunctional Jewish home, my siblings and I witnessed a poor legacy. (We always leave some kind of legacy - the question is - what kind of legacy do we leave?)
My family's legacy begins with my husband and I.
Our children know they are loved by us and by God. They have seen us serve the Lord in various ministries and in our lifestyle, and they have actively served since they were young childen, both in church and on numerous short term missions. They are both mentors in youth groups and leaders on mission trips. In fact, lifestyle is probably a word that helps define our legacy. Our faith and service are a "natural" part of our day-to-day existence.

I am interested to hear about your husband's opinion and your's too!

AlaneM said...

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children?
I do, I think we all leave a legacy for them weather we want to or not. Personally I'd like my kids themselves to be my legacy. I think about it mostly when I'm praying for my them but I confess I'm not mindful of it at other times.

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?
Not enough! I try to talk about the Lord a lot, how beauty comes from within & how everyone is beautiful bc God made us, etc. I want my kids to love the Lord & love others as the Lord loves them, live out their lives as an example for non-believers, & go on to raise their kids the same way. But I think I totally suck at living an example for them.

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy?
Growing up in a wishy-washy church with unsaved parents. I did not grow up knowing God. I knew about god but his word was up for interpretation & it was a long hard journey for me to give my life to Him. I want my kids to grow up knowing God & being sure of their faith.

A Stone Gatherer said...

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children? I think about it all the time!

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?
I want to leave a spiritual legacy so I try to live out my faith in front of them everyday. I want them also to realize the importance of family and being together! I hope when they look back over their life with the dad and mom they say "I want to raise my kids the same way"

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy? Hopefully my faith, and my love for my husband!

4. If you don't live with your legacy in mind, as a mom, what fuels you to raise up your children? I try to live it out everyday.

momstheword said...

Joanne, you really need to run not walk to Michel's post today. Look at the pictures of my followers, she is in the top row, far right and her name is Michel. Her post today is about the legacy of her grandmother and I think that this is something you'd like to read. I don't know how to do a link on a comment or I would. I will try to link it here http://whileiamwaiting423.blogspot.com/2009/02/its-all-her-fault.html

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

What great questions! And I love the subtitle of your book. I think that the longer I am a parent, the less I feel that I know what sort of a legacy I will leave. Each child responds to things differently - what one might remember as a warm, loving home might be recalled by another as stifling, for example. All I know is that all the little things we do, day in, day out, add up to something that we can't quite control. All we can do is pray that they add up to something good in the hearts of our children.

But I am still planning to shame my teen daughter with YouTube. I'm a tad conflicted, you see.

Kelly said...

I meant to leave a comment earlier but hadn't had the chance. I surely want to leave a legacy of faith. That God is our guide and we can trust in His word. I want my son to know about Jesus and His saving grace. We are not perfect, I don't want to pretend to be. I want my son to know that even though we have imperfections...God's grace allows us to start anew each and everyday. A legacy of God's unforgiving, wonderful grace...that's what I hope to leave.

Gina@Chats With An "Old Lady" said...

Hey! I guess I'm a bit late on this one. What a great question.Maybe more than one answer? I feel like my parenting is made up of all the little choices I make each day. The responses, the service, the tone of voice, etc. So many of these choices are things my kids don't even know are going on! They are so used to what they know, what they've grown up with, that I think that they can take it for granted. Much of what we do is done before the Lord, as unto Him...and may never be noticed. So, I guess my legacy is one that may go not noticed. They may remember some, and in time they will notice more and more, but I think that will be a process over time--as they become parents etc. So, I have offered "my legacy" up to the Lord, and pray that whatever it is I have given them will be used in thier lives even if they are not aware of it. And the imperfections that I am characterized by, will be covered by HIs grace.

Katie said...

1. Do you believe in or ever think about leaving a legacy for your children?
I think about this a lot. I have also thought of it as breaking past "generational curses" and not passing down any new potentially destructive behaviors.

2. How do you show this in your actions as a mom?
I have a couple of key things I think about daily: 1) I want my girls to see and desire to model the transparent, respectful and loving way their dad and I treat each other, and 2) I want them to see and desire to have the same trust and excitement in Jesus that I work toward each day, so that they can respond well in all circumstances.

3. Has there been something that you believe has defined your legacy?
Absolutely. Being in a church that was based on transparency and accountability caused me to decide that I want my children to fully know who I am - my struggles, weaknesses, and victories both now and in my past.

4. If you don't live with your legacy in mind, as a mom, what fuels you to raise up your children?
I think that would be really hard to do! I think if you live without a vision, you end up far from where you wanted to go.

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